USA Swimming News
Friday, July 27, 2018
9 Things Less Challenging Than Putting on a Tech Suit

by Chase McFadden//Contributor
‘Tis tech suit season, that time of year when swimmers the world over somehow manage to squeeze themselves into nylon-and-spandex racewear two-sizes-too-small for a two-year-old. On occasion, this process of contortionist limb-wrangling takes less than 45 minutes. Here are nine things less challenging than packing oneself into a tech suit.
- Flossing a tiger shark’s teeth with a strand of kelp.
- Out-imagining Imagine Dragons.
- Panning enough gold from a mud puddle to equal the amount in Michael Phelps’s 23 medals.
- Memorizing the entire Harry Potter series, then reciting it verbatim. Backwards. In pig Latin.
- Solving a Rubik’s Cube while swimming a 200 breaststroke blindfolded.
- Being more excited than Rowdy Gaines.
- Moonwalking on water.
- Rationally explaining the general plot synopsis of Stranger Things to another human being.
- Beating Katie Ledecky.
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